Interesting: the love does not tire, and here disappointment

Published: 19.12.2017
the love does not tire, and here disappointment

To give the love and tenderness! As it is fine! Nobody can be tired of it, especially, if the person to whom all this intends can estimate our feelings, efforts and efforts. The love does not tire. In itself. But the disappointment when our rushes remain indifferently can sadden our soul.

Classical saying & #171; love слепа» very precisely describes what we test in relation to other people. We give a maximum of to those who surround us, and we do not suspect that our feeling has some borders where it would be possible to stop it. We give ourselves without the rest.

But some perceive it as self-evident, and all our respect, love, the attention is perceived as due. It seems as in couple relations it is supposed and expected, but it not absolutely so, any relations & #8212; it is continuous exchange of feelings when & #171; you to me, and I & #8212; тебе».

Love without conditions and expectations something in exchange & #8212; this, certainly, great and noble feeling. It is what is tested, for example, by mother to the child. It is invariable and indestructible.

But such & #171; безграничнऻ the love for many people constitutes quite real danger. Just because not always she is acquitted in relation to other people who cannot estimate and answer it to the same. And then our deep and sincere feeling remains without answer.

We begin to be disappointed, suffer from the fact that we were underestimated or even betrayed. Unfortunately, such scenario & #8212; very frequent phenomenon in the relations, and today we would like to talk about it.

The disappointment forces us to open eyes and to see the truth. It really tires. But before it will come & #171; прозрение» we pass through a number of emotionally difficult stages and we ask ourselves a set of questions.

Here at once it is important to note that the disappointment not always is the first step to break in relations. Sometimes it allows us to see things such what they are in fact, that is ripened and is realistic to look at what occurs and to introduce some amendments.

Let's understand it in more detail.

There is something that we can worry only when are young: to idealize the relations, to be given them completely and without the rest, not to see shortcomings of the partner and to literally build it to a pedestal.

Errors can be corrected, they serve in order that study as them, and shortcomings need to learn to be accepted (and we have them, and others should be reconciled with them).

But all the same we know what is & #171; disappointment and обман». Those mistakes which not always it turns out to forgive.

There are facts, details, words and acts which open for us eyes and show that this or that person was at all not such as we expected.

The long or repeating disappointment not only tires us, but also will wound, destroying us from within and undermining our self-assessment and self-confidence. And it needs to be understood very well.

It is not necessary to lead up itself excessively. When heart too is tired of negative emotions, it begins & #171; затухать» or simply is given, accepts such situation.

But it is wrong. To stand disappointments and to accept that it is unpleasant to us how something & #171; нормальное» it is impossible. It is not necessary to suffer and be silent. And it is not important about what relations there is a speech: whether it be partner, friends or even children. If you do not feel to yourself due respect or saw intended desire to hurt you, time to react came. And here it is important to show hardness.

It would be quite good to make so after the first disappointment. As soon as we looked at things really, it is necessary to meet them face to face that they did not hurt us. The relations should not be under construction thus, otherwise, why they then are necessary.

If something is not pleasant to you, you have to give the feelings a shape and tell about it. If something disappointed you, show it and offer options as it can be corrected that it was not offensive for you.

If disappointments continue to upset you, then it is necessary to react more rigidly, perhaps, to change things radically. Because otherwise you will just allow to hurt yourself too and will become too vulnerable.

Do not allow to act this way with yourself.


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